2022 Adventures and Musings
Though my time in my Story Athlete entrepreneurial community, I have posted daily writings. From July 2022 through to December 2022, I sat out of the GRIT challenge these months with the intention of focusing on some other projects offline, but still did some writings here since some people ask what I have been up to.
Jackie Rioux to Chat: Random Topics
July 10 2022 at 9:53 AM
My wake up routine is reading encouraging posts to inspire my day. This morning I read Marc’s post. (About overcoming our own obstacles and keeping commitments to ourselves). Then I read Joe T’s email about conquering the lesser self…
I wasn’t really meaning to spit out a context writing but it happened lol. Here’s my pondering thoughts and hope it makes sense from my alternative perspective:
Of course, I am always thinking of how can I remove energetic blocks that are the basis behind the lesser self.
Is the lesser self our inner child?
Is it the denied aspects of our spirit, the deep dark secrets we never want to face?
Is it a major trauma of our past that needs to be acknowledged, gently healed, and then put to rest so it never rears its ugly head on us again?
Psychologically, trauma keeps us stuck at the age of the event.
Energetically, unprocessed emotions pile up a “log jam” like an energetic tumor of dead cells.
To address this inner child, or unresolved trauma, from what I have learned, we must go within and find it, then nurture a safe space for it to come to the present time with the adult version of you.
Trauma separates and breaks the spirit. This creates a feeling of being scattered, broken, misaligned… because we are!
It is only when we can align all aspects of ourselves into one sovereign self, that we really feel whole.
Feeling whole is when we can really squelch the “lesser self” inner chatter because it has no reason to be there anymore.
This lesser self, which I prefer to call the “lower vibration self”, wants to keep us safe, keep us in the familiar past, keep us in our comfort zone no matter how detrimental that familiar past may be.
By going within and creating a safe place for this inner child/ trauma to move forward to present time we’ll create a current comfort zone where our heroic self — or higher vibration self — can move forward in the flow of life more easily.
Consistency is a comfort zone of sorts. This is how routine can create freedom and space. Consistency is where I tend to get stuck myself. There is where I try to find the log jam energetic blocks so I can create consistency and flow.
Quite often, past trauma may have been a feeling of lack of control because of too much stifling or control over our inner child. Without that previous control over us, a person can feel very lost and unable to create that familiar sense of boundaries, which was actually a violation of boundaries. It really is a lot of confusion.
We always cope through life with the resources and knowledge we have at any given time. We may have regrets of the past. We may replay different scenarios in our mind and get stuck there as well.
If you have ever watched Debbie Ford’s “The Shadow Effect”, you’ll understand that ignoring or burying our past doesn’t work and it will at some point bubble to the surface wreaking havoc on our present lives.
This is all what I have learned so far about the “lesser self”, which really is a lower vibration version of our past self. Energy healing and balancing is the process of finding this past trauma, acknowledging and healing that inner child/ denied aspect/ trauma event to create a safe space in present time and to bring forward and align into wholeness.
There is no separation of lesser self vs heroic self in this analogy. There is only a lower vibration that needs healing to align and integrate with the higher vibration of self to create sovereign wholeness.
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Joe Tedesco: Great write up, Jackie! I love the vibration connection you made here.
Jackie Rioux: Remember I shared that Hawkins chart of vibration a while ago? (Power vs Force)
In my world of energy, understanding vibration is the key to understanding everything about life.
Thank you for your email this morning. I especially loved that one and following your marathon journey.
Marc Lindsay
Great post, thanks, love it.
Great questions.
Sometimes I find it’s trauma or protection.
Other times I find it’s engrained behaviours built up over a long period of time that might have arrived from the chaos of trauma but are not specifically trauma related.
Either way the journey is ultimately such a rewarding journey
Jackie Rioux: Thank you. What I have been finding in my work, and seems to be a common concept in my practitioner forums, is that we all carry and are healing ancestral trauma.
Some of these blocks and hindrances aren’t even our own crap!
I agree that this journey of life is fascinating.
I find so much inspiration in others writings and pondering that help make sense of our own journey as relatable and or thought provoking.
Chad Blecha: I agree with having an inner child stuck in time running your emotions from that distant experience.
Until we can find, accept and come to terms with it, it will continue to unknowingly sabotage us thinking it’s protecting us.
Jackie Rioux to Chat: Random Topics
July 30 2022 7:30 PM
Reflections on this past month.
Although I sat out of GRIT for July 2022, the 27th day of GRIT is always reflection day. I joined Story Athlete back in April 2020, not knowing what I was getting into. I soon realized I found my tribe of like minded souls. Down to earth, straight up good members that have become friends, mentors, and sometimes a listening ear in this safe space. The outside world has gone to hell in a hand basket for far too long and I have leaned on this safe space so much that it truly has become a life line.
Ya, I am the self proclaimed Ladybug Cheerleader here. But where do I turn when I need encouragement? There are too many honey dripping empaths and bleeding hearts out in the world. They are not the kind of people I want to hang with. I want to surround myself with like minded souls who face the world head on and deal with their own sh*t first, then lead the way for others. The entrepreneurial spirit. Kicking ass and taking names. Conquering the lesser self and forging paths for others to follow.
I have learned so much in my time here within this community. I am forever grateful. A few of my previous “follow” members have moved on to other things. I have been feeling kinda the same way honestly. We’re not so much in lock down now; events are opening up again. I have been a hermit for so long, but it is also hard to get back out there when we’ve been treated like societal outcasts and I have lost friends due to societal division. Anyways, I messaged Ashley and Ryan the other day to cancel my membership renewal due today, July 30.
Ok, ya, there has been some major horrible sh*t going on around me the past few weeks, but you’d think I cut out my own heart and life blood when I started hyperventilating and crying just waiting for my SA account to disappear.
Going back to the beginning of July, we have had some deaths of loved ones, too close to home. My high school besties son, age 38. A friends 3 year old cousin. An extended family cousin of my kids, a young father. This all is not including several of my clients where I have been supporting them through some of their own major tragedies of lost loved ones and accidents. This past month has been a minefield of upsets day after day all around us.
Did I mention that three of our five kitties got out and disappeared within days of each other? Then another blow yesterday. This one was my son’s fave coworker killed in a motorcycle accident. My son is headed home from camp work on stress leave. This is hitting him hard. Today my daughter got back into service area from camping and is held up on the highway behind an accident with two fatalities. AHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Just STOP!!!!!!!
In the midst of all these tragedies, another energy practitioner told me that I have “a karmic life lesson that not everyone will be in our lives forever”, and that I need to “go within” to find answers. She said I was too protective of my cats and they wanted their freedom. She added that this karma all ties in with my estranged daughter. It is my grandson’s birthday tomorrow and I haven’t been able to connect with or see three of my grandkids in a year. I know I need to face my own shit, but this “realization” is not sitting well with me right now.
I have been the self proclaimed Ladybug Cheerleader here in this SA community, one of the resident energy practitioners. I am the strong one that handles sh*t and comes out holding my head high. Usually. I have learned that although I am great at helping others overcome trauma, I do NOT handle death very well at all. It triggers me back to my own lost loved ones. I still work through my triggers, but man, death sucks monkey balls especially when it is accidents and young people.
So where does the strong one turn when she needs a shoulder to cry on briefly before straightening her crown and facing the world again? Here in Story Athlete. With my GRIT Warrior community.
I messaged Ryan and got that membership crap straightened out damn quick. As he has said previously in some of his GRIT contexts, writing is a form of self therapy. SA is the best open source, safe space, group therapy. I need this life line more than ever to keep my own sanity in check. Ryan, I have said it a few times, and I will keep saying it: You are an Earth Angel for founding this whole SA community. Thank you. I appreciate each and every member here as well. Truly grateful.
There is a lot of truth in the “struggle together” bonding concept. We each have our burdens to bear. In SA there is always encouraging hope between us when we can share our struggles and find the guiding lights in our pace cars.
Ok.. now that I got all that out…. Something positive:
~ A few clients have lost loved ones and thanked me for the “managing grief” page in my site that has helped them cope through their losses. (I have had to put my own grief process to some good use).
~ A new practitioner friend reached out the other day to tell me she has been meaning to reach out for the past year to tell me that she is very impressed with my website, that it obviously has been a lot of work for me. (Yes, my site has been my outlet for 20+ years…a self empowerment resource and my gift to others).
~ I have had several new clients this past month. Some of them were referred to me from people I wasn’t even aware of that promoted me as “gifted”. Very humbling, yet appreciated. (Maybe I seem to be doing better outwardly than I feel inside some days?).
Looking forward over this next month: My writing focus will be on more of my own website content. With so many new potential clients reaching out, I have many more writings to finish up and add to my site.
I need to get my head back on straight. My personal therapy is rock concerts. The last concert I went to was in 2019. I haven’t bought a ticket yet for Cariboo Rocks next weekend, but thinking I may just do that. Screaming along with 3 days of classic rockers is my therapy indeed.
With my son being home, I feel God’s country is calling for a drive out to Mount Robson. Highway Zen and tunes. No service. Glacial Waters. Nature and the open starry nights. My mountain is calling and I must go.
My SA life line is still intact, so I will be back sooner than later. Peace out.
Brett Wininger: Jackie Rioux sorry to hear about all your loses, having them occur in a short span is definitely overwhelming.
I’m glad you see the value and support of the Community, we are here to share in other’s burdens and joys.
As I have navigated Life’s challenges and difficulties, I’ve found it beneficial to keep my focus on being of Service to others and their struggles.
It helps me to gain perspective and insights on my situations.
For this to work I often have to physically put myself in positions where this can happen.
Cause if I wait till I feel like doing it, it probably won’t happen.
Glad you are still here.
Jackie Rioux: thank you. Everything is going well with clients and serving others.
But when the minefield is around family… ugh.
Just found out my sister’s father in law passed as well.
I’m the matriarch in our family. It’s hard when my own foundations get shaken to the core.
CJ Thomas: Wow, that’s a rough span of events there Jackie. Prayers and best wishes to you.
Neil Sekol: Jackie, I obviously can’t say I understand your recent and current pains. I only know that God can give you grace to endure it. Praying for you and yours at these times of grief and struggles. We are here for you. Just tell us how and when we can help.
Jackie Rioux: thank you. Just having the connection here and the knowing that i have a community of support and safe space that gives me peace and strength. Thank you.
Bob Little: Big hugs to you and your family! We will miss you.
Bryan Harris: Oh hello Jackie. You are in my prayers. May God bless you and your family.
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For anyone who need it, this is my “managing grief” page: https://ladybugwellness.ca/managing-grief/
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GRIT August 2022
SA-Name:// JACKIE RIOUX
Day of GRIT: #1 of 28
Posted to Random GRIT chat August 4 2022
Where’s my techie language people here? I would appreciate some assistance please. I have techie language issues. Oh.. and I have come up with a new term for how I feel: digitally constipated.
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Back story:
I am skilled in my own language and industry with energy healing and psychology. I am NOT skilled in mechanics or financial stuff. I have a great mechanic and a great accountant. They take care of stuff for me and I trust them. I have my web host guy too that takes care of hosting my website. I learn the maintenance stuff for my vehicle, accounting, and website and then we’re all good.
I need to buy a new computer. But this is turning into an ordeal!!!!!!!!
It takes me a while to grasp new stuff but when I do, I fly. Example, I have had 7 cell phones since 1998. When I need a new one, I go in to store, tell them what I need and to give me something that will work for my needs. I don’t their sales pitches. Simple. I figure it out from there and sometimes find a new feature that is cool and I am like a kid at Christmas lol.
I hate shopping. I hate having way tooo many choices and decisions that I cannot figure out what is best for my needs. I hate being “sold to” with an overwhelm of marketing.
Here in SA I love that we get ‘er done. But the outside world is damn frustrating when other people, especially business people, are not on the same page with communication.
Computer … I have a dinosaur I bought back before 2012. Mother board has been replaced once. It is a small hard drive desktop running Windows 7 professional with 2010 Microsoft Office Student page as I was in college back then.
Things are running slow. I need upgrades and get with modern techie stuff so I can run my business effectively. I have had to learn Acuity scheduling. Zoom., Logitech camera. Excel. Word. I am not great, but I manage quite well now. I work a lot online with my clients so I cannot be disconnected for very long.
Current ordeal:
I arranged a scheduled appointment with a locally recommended shop so we could use time effectively, or so I thought. They had my computer for a day. Decided to buy new rather than upgrade as they cannot find parts for the compact case I have.
Brought computer home and re-hooked up. Opened Excel. OMG WTF! The interface looked like 1995 dial up and completely blown up. Ran back to shop. He’s never seen that happen before. Installed temp free Libre Office so I can open files but I’ve not been able to work effectively as before as it is missing some features from Excel.
I explained how I my use computer for business and what I do etc. I told him a cost estimate I am prepared to pay which was more than he said was needed. I told him what I paid for current computer years ago so expecting at least that much again if not more for NEW computer. Said it would be a few days to order in. It took a week. Got an email from shop. They need half a day to transfer over all my data.
I finished up everything for that day, disconnected and ran down to shop expecting to be offline a day. Next day (yesterday) I called. There is a problem. He ordered a 500GB computer. My current one is 1TB and I am using 60% of that, so 600GB. He needs to upgrade the new computer already. I reiterated that I want a NEW completely upgraded computer that will work for my needs.
I do not want anything Apple/ proprietary.
I want a desktop not a laptop.
I want something that can be interchangeable and upgradable as needed.
Something that will last a long time, as much as digital hardware will last, at least.
Lots of data memory room.
Options for backup/ synchronization of files. I have pictures and videos from passed loved ones, plus all my business documents.
New Microsoft office package. Word, Excel.
A DVD/CD player that will still play my old disks (backwards compatible, is that right term?)
Now my son alerted me on some other techie processor thing I need for upgrade. SSD vs. hard drive?
I am having serious communication issues and I am still held up on being able to work properly with Excel interface messed up. I appreciate in SA that we all get ‘er done. When I get in the outside world and face communication issues with someone that does not seem to be on board with my just “get it done” attitude, I am frustrated beyond belief right now.
This shop is highly recommended locally. They speak techie language. Why is it so hard to communicate layman’s terms to those outside of the language barrier of your industry to accommodate the needs of the customer? Why is there so much choices and confusion for me. I just want simple that works for me.
I don’t like dealing with new techie stuff so when I decide to make that jump, I want stuff to work properly and be quick and easy. This is not my experience right now. This has been over a month since I first arranged that appointment and started the process with this shop, along with 3 days no computer and I am no farther ahead.
Does anyone here know enough techie language to tell me exactly what to ask for in buying a new computer?
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Danny DeGrie: Excel is easy fix. Download from Microsoft.
Tell computer guy you need a laptop with 1 TB SSD storage. Decent processing speed and around 8 GB of RAM.
Don’t worry about brand. Except no apple like you want. Simple.
Jackie Rioux Danny DeGrie Thank you.
Easy solution, I just called another shop. Turns out they were the ones who replaced the hard drive in this one back in 2015.
He completely understood me and I am heading there this afternoon with a whole lot of trust.
At least he is not talking to me like deer in headlights other guy and doesnt make me feel like a dumbass for not speaking techie fluently.
I will use these terms though. Thank you!!!!
Jackie Rioux
Update after 3 weeks of delays and frustration with a “recommended” shop:
Went to the other shop today. He actually understood me. Didn’t make me feel completely techie illiterate, gave simple options for exactly what i want and need PLUS he explained a computer like a human body analogy.
And… talked to me like a fellow small business person.
I don’t know how the first shop is even in business when this guy outshined every other techie person i have ever met.
Oh, and for a minimal charge they have on site set up as well.
Breathe… by mid week I’ll be good to go with modern upgrades.
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SA-Name:// JACKIE RIOUX
Day of GRIT: #5 of 28
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GRIT Team Ghost, with a concert goer burnt “tan”
METRICS: 12 Minutes of lively movement
CONTEXT: We’re here for a good time, not a long time
My son is home from work on stress leave as his fave coworker, a mentor to him, passed in a motorbike accident just over a week ago. We lost my son in law Larry in a motorbike accident back in 2018, and he was my son’s big bro. This recent loss is triggering previous loss for my son, and for me as well as I try to support him through this grief process.
I mentioned previously that July was a landmine of losses around our family in various ways.
As I find ways to navigate this time so I can be the strong one for others as I always have been, I am finding that “death” is super triggering for me personally. When I published my story back in 2017, I talked about a trauma analogy as messages in bottles that we keep on a shelf, similar to the idea of ships in bottles.
The concept of that analogy is that every time an upset happens, the bottles fall and shatter into a million shards and it is painful to relive each upset in the tidal waves of resulting emotions. Over time we get better at picking up the mess, and eventually we can store these events in Plexiglass bottles and completely shut the door on the storage room of memories.
This is kind how the amygdala and the PSOAS muscle works in storing trauma memories. Everything needs to be cleaned out properly then stored away neatly sealed up. If not processed properly, these memories will wreak havoc in our lives when they eventually explode like the time bombs they are. The explosives must be diffused properly before storage. (Reference suggestion: watch Debbie Ford documentary “The Shadow Effect”).
Back to how we are coping over here. Sometimes it is good to just cut loose and forget the world for a bit. After an almost 3 year hiatus, Cariboo Rocks finally happened. Eleven bands over 3 days. I had gone to the previous 2 annual events and was front and center, showing up in the promo pan shots over the audience. We got tickets the day before this event. My eldest daughter, my son, and me. We kinda joked around with some other attendees that so many of us felt like we were “getting outta jail” finally with the dreaded C19 lockdown that dragged on for far too long.
We did have great time at the concert. I had no desire or enthusiasm to be front and center this time though. We wandered around, danced along a bit, and generally stayed back from the main crowds. I got in the equivalent of 5K in steps through each evening.
These were classic bands. Music is the language of the soul. It invokes all the memories and the feelings, the emotions of present and past.
Tom Cochrane played Big League. The tears flowed freely for that one. My SIL Larry was in a hockey league, that song is a Larry song. Then, Boy Inside The Man was an Andy song we used in his tribute video.
Trooper is a Canadian local iconic band. A long time fave. One of their songs was written about a coastal town close to where I grew up, known as the Rainy City.
The lyrics go like this:
“A very good friend of mine
Told me something the other day
I’d like to pass it in to you
‘Cause I believe what he said to be true
He said
We’re here for a good time
Not a long time
So have a good time
The sun can’t shine every day
And the sun is shinin’
In this rainy city
And the sun is shinin’
Oh, isn’t it a pity
And every year, has its share of tears
And every now and then it’s gotta rain
We’re here for a good time
Not a long time
So have a good time
The sun can’t shine every day”
I was so glad that my son actually had a good time and enjoyed the 3 days. His workplace posted an endearing obituary for his co-worker and I think the concert may have lifted his spirits a bit at least.
There was a lot of time to think though. Realizing that “death” triggers me so much, I have been trying to address this within myself. Going all the way back to age 12 when two little girls I babysat on regular weekends died in a house fire on a Monday afternoon. With that same family a few years later, I had babysat their baby son on a weekend. That baby died of SIDS with another babysitter days later.
When I dated my children’s father, I went to a family funeral at 4 months pregnant , then many more. My daughter was in grade 3 when I took her to a funeral for her 5 year school mate. I can list off way too many tragedies and all the tribute markers in my home town.
I can think back to so many deaths too close our home and family spanning many years. Do I just know too many people? Connections through a small home town? I know death is a part of life, but holy crap. Can I please get off this roller coaster?
No wonder “death” is so triggering for me!!! Each and every time there is a death close to me, those ships in bottles shatter into a million shards of painful memories. Each death triggers a “mortality check” of re-evaluating life and priorities. I just read the fisherman’s parable again. It is about a fisherman approached by a businessman encouraging him to amplify production and make it big, and all for the end result of doing what the fisherman is already doing in enjoying life. Maybe this is why I have no attractions to anything big and flashy in life?
I am so thankful for my energy balancing skills and my prayer cards to get me through low places. Psalm 23 and the Lord’s Prayer. Whether you are a religious person or not, these two passages are essential to lifting and clearing energy. Energy balancing is a way of creating sunshine inside and not depending on the outside world. I am finding ways to get myself unstuck from the triggers of all these deaths and the FOMO (Fear Of Missing Out) I feel on behalf of the losses of young lives.
I have always been the strong one that others can lean on. I have had to be the strong one because I have never had the luxury of being protected fully. My father protected me in his own skewed way. Both of my ex husbands had the backbone of a jellyfish. In Body Code, we have some terminology “spirit out of body”, “no will to live”, and “will to die” imbalances. I have felt “knocked out of my body” quite often lately and have had to re-ground myself regularly the past few weeks particularly. Today, August 8, is what is called the Lion’s Portal, a heightened energetic pull of earth energy that is excellent for clearing out energetic clutter then manifesting and creating a better life. My computer is going in the shop today (this is IT finally!). Without internet connection, I am focusing today on my own energy healing.
I am doing my best to re-prioritize the life I am living to make it a good one because ….
“We’re here for a good time
Not a long time
So have a good time
The sun can’t shine every day”
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Neil Sekol: Praying for you, your son, and all others impacted by these recent losses.
Jackie Rioux: Neil Sekol thank you.
Brett Wininger: Jackie Rioux
Father, strengthen your Daughter as she strives to be a source of strength and comfort to others however she needs her comforters and supporters also.
May she continued to be uplifted so she can develop her voice that will positively impact others that have experienced similar losses and will need that encouraging and empathic word from another.
Help to remind her that all pain here, all suffering here and all losses here are just temporary, one day all of these will be eliminated forever.
In Jesus precious name we pray, Amen.
Jackie Rioux: Brett Wininger thank you so much.
Ladybug Wellness: Marnie McBain I chose #3… fitting for me, eh? (Intuitive Butterfly card reading about “Dog” spirit animal being a protective mom)
Marnie McBain: Very fitting…it seems truly amazing to me how there is so much death in one person’s life…the understanding of death, the processing of death, I believe (after reading your above message) is one of your soul’s important messages in this lifetime…And this type of lesson isn’t given to young souls…this is only a lesson given to old souls – those souls who have the strength and capacity to understand, process and learn…death is not truly an ending – it’s an ending to our understanding of physical life – but the soul is eternal…And although the living continue to miss the physical presence of those who’ve crossed over, we know their soul is eternal.
Much Love Jackie…Rest, relax and take that break you deserve so much
Jackie N. Rioux: Marnie McBain I’m not liking this “lesson”.
Marnie McBain: Jackie N. Rioux I feel like it’s one that you’ve pretty much mastered…you’re going to be ready to move forward soon…
August 9 2022
SA-Name:// JACKIE RIOUX
Day of GRIT: #6 of 28
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GRIT Team Ghost
METRICS: 12 Minutes of lively movement
CONTEXT: Music is the language of the soul
What is music? It is a vibrational energy. Recognizing that everything is energy, and everything is connected through energy and vibration, it is understandable that music is considered a universal language of the soul.
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Some poignant quotations on music:
Why music is the language of the soul?
The melodies alone are able to convey messages, soul to soul. A beautiful melody can bring tears to one’s eyes. It is powerful enough to soften the hardest heart and heal the most painful memory. Music breaks barriers of time and space, provides comfort for the grieving, and calms the anxious mind.
“Music, once admitted to the soul, becomes a sort of spirit, and never dies.” “Music touches us emotionally, where words alone can’t.” “Where words fail, music speaks.” “Music is the universal language of mankind.”
“Music speaks the language of the soul, penetrating into the past and resonating into the future, unearthing pain and tenderness and sorrow and joy, reminding us of our infinite fragility and extraordinary strength, reigniting our dreams and passions once again to remind us of who we are meant to be.”
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Music can stir emotions of anticipation and motivation. It can heal through specific Solfeggio Hz tones. It can soothe, and it can rile up the masses.
The famous water experiment conducted by Masaru Emoto showed how words and music infused into water could change the water crystals into pleasant beautiful patterns or scattered discordant patterns depending on the positive or negative vibration the water was exposed to. The human body is composed of 50 to 75% water, on average. This means that music can have a significant impact on our minds and bodies.
I often reference this analogy in regards to the depth and feeling of music: two music critics were listening to singers audition a love song. The seasoned critic pointed out the difference between two of the singers. One sang the love song eloquently, but with no depth. The other had experienced heartbreak and therefore sang from a place of pain which gave the song a more genuine emotional depth. The reasoning here is akin to the nightingale that throws itself into a thorn bush, and pierces itself. Only then does it sing its most beautiful songs.
Have you ever resonated with analogies like these and referenced them numerous times, only to be blindsided with another analogy that ties everything together?
This morning I came across a poetry piece from John Roedel, known for his Hey God, Hey John musings. This poem was about feeling broken with numerous holes in his heart. God said he is now like a woodwind instrument that can make beautiful music. Whoa.
There is another concept of looking back at life as a tapestry, like a work of art where the dark threads represent the low times that highlight the lighter threads and good times. Sometimes life can get really low and crappy when we lose loved ones and the voids feel like holes in our hearts. We may think of our passed loved ones as spirits that can feel like a cool breeze around us.
Putting this all together, it is an endearing thought that we can still make music from the depths of our soul and cherish all the memories of a life well lived.
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August 11 2022
SA-Name:// JACKIE RIOUX
Day of GRIT: #8 of 28
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GRIT Team Ghost
METRICS: 12 Minutes of lively movement
CONTEXT: I embrace new technology…
I embrace new technology… Or do I? After the month-long ordeal with one shop, I went to another shop last Friday and yesterday a tech came on site to set up and install everything. Impressive when someone can be efficient and effective with customer service.
I think the last time I had any proper computer upgrades was back in 2015. I have always had a hard time transitioning to new techie stuff, but once I do grasp it all, I can fly solo no problem.
That is where I am at today. Adjusting to all the updates and new-fangled funky look of everything. I think I have most of the distracting bells and whistles and pop ups shut off now. I am a Keep It Simple Sweetie (KISS) kind of person.
Business is going quite well. Keeping with the times and modern upgrades are necessary to serve my clients in the best way possible. This is not a comfortable process for me, but I do my best to embrace new technology that will create a better life in the long run.
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August 18 2022
Summer has flown by way too quick. I had no idea what I was getting into last weekend volunteering for a music festival two hours away in a natural habitat nestled in the Mount Robson Valley. Just stayed one night and helped out in the kitchen and at a security gate. They say it is not a “hippie fest”. No, it is not quite so unregulated, but they are a lot of amazing “granola” type people that appreciate nature’s bounty in many ways. I met several wonderful people there.
Silly me though, I wore my flip flops the first day and paid for it dearly with tired sore feet after walking and being on my feet quite so much. Thankfully Melissa gave me a bit of a foot rub while sitting under a tree by the performance stage.
Once I got home, I scrambled to get prepared for my Reiki class on Monday August 15th. This was a family affair and lots of fun with these ladies. Mother, sister and daughter team.
One interesting highlight of the morning was that the daughter is extremely intuitive and saw a man behind me saying “I love you”. Of course, I know that is Andy. She also saw a young boy playing a poking his head out from my Reiki room. We had a sidetracked discussion for a few minutes about Andy, Larry and Darrel.
Later in the day, she told me that my guides are screaming a warning to not get into a yellow and white cab. We have no idea what that was supposed to mean, but point taken.
The Reiki class was fun and it was an enjoyable and interesting day with these ladies.
I found out this week that there was a memorial event for Darrel in Grande Prairie last weekend at his brother’s home. His sister had posted in a group where I am not a member because his mom blocked me. While I feel left out in never having been acknowledged in my feelings for my soul mate, why does this really matter? No one can ever take away from me my memories and the soul connection I had, and continue to have, with Darrel.
This morning, Jared and I are taking off for a turn n burn quick road trip to Terrace so we can visit friends and family and just go for a long 6-hour drive. Back for Saturday to help Melissa with Summerfest fair booth.
I am slowly adjusting to all the updates and newness of my computer and software etc. I seem to have lost all my sign in passwords which is making things frustrating but slowly getting through that and getting back to business as usual.
August 21 2022
We are back from Terrace. We were there pretty much just 24 hours. It was a 6-hour drive with a with potty and snacks stops. We spent the evening visiting with my mom and sister Tammy. Their new cat Coco took to me quickly and slept near me all night.
in the morning, I had my monthly session call with Sue V. We had a little trouble connecting at first with technical issues but a long good chat. It always amazes me what she finds for imbalances for me. Fascinating as usual.
Mom and I went to visit Ruth, my “Big Sis”. Ruth was a postal coworker years ago and my shoulder through some tough times. We had an interesting tea time chatting about genealogy. Then we drive into town to have a quick visit and hugs with Ingrid at work on her break. She works in the floral dept surrounded by pretties.
Even though I just talked to Kerry a few days before, I didn’t manage to connect with her for a visit, but we drove up to the cemetery to see Andy’s memorial plaque and found a few others place markers for other people we have known.
We went back out to Mom’s place and stopped at a few garage sales along the way. I found a brand-new Epicure multipot (retail value $70) for a mere $3. Start the car and run!!!
Jared spent the day with his paternal grandparents, as was the purpose of this quick visit. Once he was back with us, we went out for dinner at a Japanese Ninja restaurant.
I had shown Mom how to sign up for Flashfood app and got her first purchase with a promotional discount. We got gas while there and headed back to Mom’s place to pack up and head out. Jared and I had quite a long reminiscent chat through the whole drive.
We got in and into bed about 2 am. This was a quick trip because I had promised Melissa that I would man her booth for Summerfest downtown. We were there from 10 am til almost 4 pm. Unfortunately, the BCNE fair was also this weekend, so Summerfest was not as well attended as in the past. I told Melissa we probably need to look at Returns on Time and Investment for these fairs. She does well with having her artisan products carried in local stores and listed online for sale, but manning a booth for several hours does not seem to be the best use of time for such limited exposure.
Driving a total of 12 hours in a two-day span caught up with me and I opted to go to bed early last night.
Today my focus has been on website pages and business computer projects.
I have opened up my scheduler for this week and already getting bookings coming in fast. YAY!
August 31 2022:
I reflect on my results:
In our Story Athlete (SA) community, the end of the month is a time to reflect on the past month of progress. This has been a great personal habit to develop and to continue, whether I participate in the monthly GRIT challenge or not.
Reflection gives us a change to see what is working and what is not. The best part is that reflection is encouraging when we can see how far we’ve come in 30 days. Mini increments to our personal growth journey are not so visible in the daily wash rinse repeat cycle, but 30 days can add up to significant progress.
Many of my practitioner forums have been talking about triggers, more intense earth energy (Schumann Resonance), and astrological influences. While I do notice some of these issues in myself and around me through family, friends, clients and community, I also have learned that continuously working on ourselves brings much more of a resolved observational type of inner peace rather than a reactive type personality to life’s curveballs.
July was an awfully crappy month all around, emotionally, with losses triggering me. I am blessed with energy balancing skills to cope through traumatic upsets, and to be able to turn low times into inspirations I can then share with my clients and others around me.
August was an upswing for the most part. We took in a 3 day/ 11 band concert festival, a camping style folk music festival, then a quick road trip to my home town.
Mind: Music is the language of the soul, and this month was definitely a music month with two festivals. The 6 hour (each way) road trip drive with my son was an assortment of Highway Zen tunes from AC/DC and Rammstein to Roxette and Zamfir. A lot of reminiscing and memories shared. Precious time with my son. Visits with dear friends soothe the soul as well.
I have mentioned many times previously that I have another practitioner I work with for myself and we find some interesting imbalances for me to address! As I already knew, “death” came up as a trigger for me and in clearing that energy, I have made a few realizations. I have been “stuck” with regards to my SIL’s memorial tributes. I have wanted to make a proper tribute for him in my website instead of on an unstable social media platform. I have a page for him but I have realized that a PDF “book” would be a better way to gather everything in one place. I am now working on that project so I can finally lift that weight from my mind.
Body: While I have not engaged in full on workouts consistently, I have made time to keep stretching and moving daily. One thing to mention here was that at the camping style music festival, I walked around in flip flops all the first day and I crippled myself for that mistake! I got in the equivalent of 5K steps both days. I wore orthotics the second day. I KNOW I should always wear proper footwear. Camping at a hippie-granola style festival is no excuse. I paid dearly for that lack of self-awareness and care. Not much else to report on Body other than detoxing supplements and middle-aged female issues. Ya, that kind of fun stuff. I’m 55 so it is about time for that transition. Thankfully I know how to balance my own hormones so I do have to experience some of the horrors that many other women have professed. I did have a few days of down time though. Rest and rejuvenate. I do feel pretty good now after all that detoxing though.
Business: The biggest news this month was upgrading an entirely new computer and software. Remember that I am a “non techie”? I am quite proud of myself that I have managed quite well adjusting to everything and am now flying efficiently enough. I did lose all my passwords somehow so that has been a fun ride with ADHD Scrat brain, but again, I am managing quite well so far. My focus has been to catch up emails and website content. I have a good system now; I just need to be consistent. A day off still means two days behind. I am working on that aspect as well trying to make the best use of some automation while keeping client connection personal and manageable.
I blocked my calendar a bit this month knowing I would be away here and there. Every time I unblock a spot, someone books in immediately. I find it inspiring and encouraging that I can look ahead a week and have “nothing booked in”, but by the end of the week I have been full of appointments. I am really blessed to have the clientele and connections that I have. So many wonderful people. The rewards for me personally in working with clients and see miracles unfold daily, is beyond priceless. I have a really rich life in blessed connections.
That brings me to Relationships. I figured with road trips and concerts that I would just lapse my SA membership since I sat out of GRIT a while anyway. Big mistake. I seriously started hyperventilating! Ok, maybe I am not in the partner investor part of SA. Maybe I am not participating in GRIT every month consistently. But I have been a part of this open-source entrepreneurial community for the past 2+ years. These are like minded souls of business and personal growth type mindsets. People who keep accountability and integrity as the forefront in their lives. These are connections I want to emulate and to keep close. To keep on a progressive growth path, it is wiser to soar with the eagles than to commiserate with pigeons. When I go out in public, it sometimes is too “people-y” out there. Too “pigeon holed” and restrictive in closed minded thinking.
Side tracked thoughts: Did you know that the life span of a pigeon is about 6 years, while an eagle is about 30 years? I wonder the reasons behind that fun fact and why eagles are so revered.
Honestly, I love all birds and I am not discriminating our feathered friends here, but the figurative analogy is interesting to me. My thoughts are now wondering if Scrat may be food for eagles… uh oh… Good thing I can identify with eagles as a Spirit Animal rather than a pigeon.
One of the main philosophies of Story Athlete and GRIT is that those who struggle together, bond together. I need my SA community because this is my form of group therapy lol!
Overall, this has been a pretty good month and decent progress as well.
This past week, I watched a Turkish Netflix series called Another Self (English dubbed). It is a movie about 3 women, college friends, facing some struggles so they take a trip to the seaside. The kicker for me in this series is that it shows Family Constellation Therapy energy healing technique which is the idea behind the ancestral healing I do in my own energy healing work. It is wonderful that energy healing is becoming so much more accepted and recognized. With more people starting to understand their own journey of addressing ancestral and personal healing, practitioners like me are becoming much more sought after with busy schedules. Very rewarding indeed to have the honor of sharing my passions with them.
I’ll be sitting out of GRIT again for September as I have another road trip planned mid-September. We’ll see how everything falls into place as this month is also milestone birthdays for my son (30) and my granddaughter (19).
Check back here for updates…
Sept 8: I finally got in with a decent hair stylist at a salon. Three hour appointment with color correction, cut and color. This one FINALLY got all that dreaded black out from too much residual color. YAY!!! The only drawback was when I went to pay. Nope, I did not confirm cost beforehand. So, $345 with a 15% tip was $380. I have never spent that much on my hair before. OMG!!!! But, we got the annoying black color out.
Jackie N. Rioux
September 12 at 5:18 PM
Laugh with me not at me, mkay?
I have been in my home 16 years. I love my duplex and it is my oasis. Not being the handyman type, I have had to learn a few skills along the way. All good. I have had some pretty poor experiences with hired handymen in the past, but more recently blessed with some contacts I can count on for repairs etc. Life is pretty good that way now.
A few weeks ago, the combination light fixture fan in my bedroom needed a new lightbulb. I went and got one from the cupboard and replaced it as I have done many times before over the years.
Well, the whole thing glitched. Another bulb blew. I replaced that one. Now nothing seemed to work with the bulbs having a dim and glitchy glow. Ok, great fun… add to to-do list of repairs. Not super important because it is still light out in the evenings. I hate shopping so having to purchase a new light fixture is not on my priority list.
My mom is coming to town this week though so I better get on this somewhat simple project.
My former son in law from 2 years ago is a certified electrician. I reached out to him and explained the problem. He said he could stop by tomorrow and check it all out, but first some questions.
Does the fan work? I checked. I don’t use that fan much, but yes it did turn on. I explained that it goes, but it is kinda laboring and sounds like a sick cow.
Ok, good. Did you use LED lightbulbs? I checked the light bulb box. Yup, well aren’t all new lightbulbs LED now? Yes, he says…
Next, is the light fixture on a switch or a dimmer? A dimmer.
Now check the bulbs if they are dimmable.
Well, sh*t. Apparently not.
We’ve had a history with some dumbass naivety between us. Like the time he jumper cabled my vehicle and set off sparks on a still connected cable. Thank God we can have some laughs at my predicaments…
Apparently, I need to just go shopping and do better at reading the labels on the wide selection of lightbulbs.
September 12 2022
Jackie How much are you charging for expert advice for dumba** here? Lol
Darren: Hahaha. For you it’s always free advice lol
Jackie: Thank you. Thank God it’s only you and not some stranger lol.
Darren: You’re welcome. Yes, some stranger would probably try and milk it for sure
Jackie: Say hi to your mom when you tell her your dumba** of the day story lol
Darren: I will. My dumbass story of the day is don’t assume someone turned off the breaker. Test with your tester not your fingers. Otherwise, it’s a shockingly good time. Haha 🤦
Jackie: I remember similar with jumper cables lol
Darren: I still haven’t learned my lesson apparently lol
September 19 2022 12:16 PM
Jackie: hi….. soooo…. does using wrong lightbulbs fry the whole thing?
Jackie: I got incandescent ones and I got LED dimmables… nothing works at all now. I flipped switch too. Changed out all 3 bulbs. Nothing.
Darren: Shouldn’t fry anything by changing bulbs. Pull cord on the fan off?
Jackie: FFS! I am a dumba**
Jackie: Thank you … again.
Jackie: I am just gonna blame Mercury Retrograde ok? Sheesh… Mom was here a few days. You’d think we would have figured it out.
Darren: Well. I’m just glad it works anyways. I’d blame retrograde too haha.
Darren: And you’re welcome 😊
Jackie N. Rioux: Not the first time I have had issues… This was another funny incident:
https://www.facebook.com/jackie.h.rioux/posts/pfbid0LmcQ7Hofz9tmU1AaPwVrpRG1Ab1jRxBmB68B1anF89bmMFys5w1c5j88gSeyXY2Fl
Debby Loset: Oh, Jackie…you’re awesome…hahaha 😂 Know that you’re not alone with this stuff. I can relate!
Jackie N. Rioux: Debby Loset I try…. At least i am good for entertainment 😛
Debby Loset: Goes to show that no matter how smart we are, there are just some things that “aren’t our forte”, hey? 😊
Jackie N. Rioux: Debby Loset exactly. I am super skilled in energy balancing, alternative holistic stuff.
Techie and mechanical stuff high lights my inner dumbass with glowing reviews.
September 25 2022. Where the heck did the past month go? Several people have been asking me what’s up over here. I haven’t been posting regular daily GRIT posts. Haven’t jumped back in yet. So, another catch up post here for those asking about my personal life:
I had blocked off some of my September calendar anticipating family visiting and a possible practitioner retreat in Okanagan Falls. The retreat is being postponed til spring.
Sept 15, 16: Mom and sister Tammy, as well as SIL Mike came into town for birthday celebrations. For my granddaughter Lizz’s 19th birthday, we all enjoyed teppanyaki cuisine at Shogun restaurant. Our chef put on quite an amazing show.
Then for my son Jared’s 30th birthday, we had a BBQ and ice cream cake with family and friends. He is not fond of a big fanfare so we kept it all low key. He had just got home in time for Shogun dinner and went back out to camp work on the 20th.
Mom and sister were here a few days, then went to visit my sister Danya in southern BC, then were back here for two nights before leaving for their home this morning.
Feels like a whole lot of whirlwinds, but all good.
I unblocked my calendar and… I love my clients… time slots filled up quickly.
We had a brief 3.4 earthquake here on September 21st afternoon. Quite shocking as this is not normal here. Honestly, we and many others felt like something hit the buildings we were in, others didn’t feel anything. Thankfully brief and as some have said, good thing to relieve pressure in tectonic plates to avoid anything worse.
September 17: I have had a recommended book on my shelves for ages and finally read it. I cringed, I cried, I laughed my butt off out loud. Bittersweet and so endearing. If you love animals, you must read this book … and check out their website and YouTube as well.
“If only they could talk”, Bonnie Reynolds and Dawn Hayman Spring Farm CARES. It is all about the beginning of their rescue sanctuary in New York.
While Jared was home, we have been watching streamed 911 series. He has commented that this series has evoked the most tears and laughter from me. Shush!! But, ya.
When he is gone to work camp, I sometimes watch some shows on my own. I watched Netflix Life after Death series with Tyler Henry. It was interesting for me anyway. He reads people and delivers messages from passed loved ones. Those processes with a trusted intuitive can be quite healing.
That’s it for personal catch up this month. Otherwise, I have been focusing on re-arranging website pages to be more user friendly in the site map. Yes, I seem to be doing that continuously. I just find it better to add another page in my site to write and or to answer repetitive client questions and concerns.
When time seems to fly by these days, I feel it is imperative to write more in my site to address more collectively. There is only one of me and many people out there that I hope to serve in the best way I can.
I had been feeling like my writing skills have been “constipated”. In my monthly session with “My Lady Sue”, we addressed this and released some blocks. Something definitely shifted as I now feel more clarity and hopeful. It has been really weighing on me that I need to write a memoir of my third daughter and my experiences there before I can fully make a nice tribute for my passed SIL Larry. That is another project I am working on now.
That’s all for now, folks.
Posted to SA random topics
Jackie Rioux November 9, 2022
I’d appreciate some thoughts or advice from anyone who would care to chime in.
two of my long time friends from back home (known them 25+ years) lost their children in the last few months. One just posted this article today.
These deaths are only 2 of about 20 people our family knows within 2 degree separation that have passed since July.
I have been absolutely stuck for words and I have been having to work through my own triggers with death.
I lost my SIL 4 years ago. That is the closest I have come to losing a child (I have 4 by birth). I have known too many other cases from years past of people who have lost children and it is beyond human imagination of devastating no matter the circumstances.
I read this article and it is just not sitting right with me and I cannot vocalize why.
I know we shouldn’t compare pain and tragedies, but I still cannot get past the idea of losing a child being the worst thing any human being can go through.
If anyone wants to offer a “GRIT” perspective, I am all ears.
https://midlifepursuits.com/four-reasons-why-you-should-never-compare-your-pain-with-others/
Arleigh Cortez: I’m not really sure what you’re asking.
but I will share that I did lose a child.
2 days after he turned one.
and yes… in my whole life, it is the worse pain I have felt in my life.
with that being said, I think people FEEL harder than others.
so, there may be situations in which, for that person, could be waaay worse.
people kill themselves for less.
is losing a child the worse tragedy?
maybe.
but I would imagine that a husband or wife losing their spouse could be just as painful.
Neil Sekol: My in-laws lost their only son to cancer before he turned 25. That was 23 years ago and it hurt the whole family. Then my f-i-l lost his oldest daughter (60) 2 months ago to cancer. And last week my f-i-l lost his younger brother at the age of 78 to cancer. These all followed my f-i-l losing his Dad (early 50’s) in his sleep. He ended up being the primary support for his Mom and his d-i-l. The daughter’s family and his brother’s family are 8 and 25 hours away, respectively. But it still hurts, but perhaps not as much as a younger son who was minutes away and always in communication. Just an outsider’s observation.
CJ Thomas: Michelle Ellis may have some insight here.
My mom’s been beyond devastated for the last 1.5 years since losing my dad. It’s conceivable that she’d be worse off had it been one of her four boys… but at some point, pain and suffering is just pain and suffering, right? The comparison doesn’t really help much.
Per your point, “I still cannot get past the idea of losing a child being the worst thing any human being can go through.” Hard to say, right? Children have been abducted and put through the sex trafficking industry. You couldn’t really tell one of them who escaped that there’s a worse kind of pain and suffering that they’ll never know, right?
But let’s just assume for a moment that you’re 100% correct- that losing a child is the worst pain of all. Now what? Seriously, now what? (Please don’t take the following the wrong way.) But does it really help at all to know that you’ve won the Victim Olympics? Maybe it does, maybe it doesn’t. But I think we’re focusing on the wrong question from the onset. Rather than ranking suffering from easiest to hardest, the real question becomes ‘What comes next?’ — Who will you become following the tragedy? Will it become the event that defines you for the remainder of your days? Or will you find a way to transmute that atrocity into a catalyst, a mission, a passion, a purpose, a calling, an homage to the person who’s no longer around to have the experiences and impact on this plane of existence that you can?
Obviously, this isn’t easy and it’s highly likely that the pain never goes away entirely. But I find it more interesting to ponder: Has somebody else gone through similar pain AND found a way to move forward/ give more/ contribute more/ be inspired/ become inspiring/ live abundantly/ carve out a path/ help others/ etc… despite (or more likely, because of) the unthinkable event you’ve endured?
None of this is meant to invalidate your suffering. But I think it makes a massive difference which question you focus on: Is my suffering the worst? VS. Who am I going to become in the aftermath?
Much love to you regardless.
Jackie Rioux: CJ Thomas this is exactly what I needed, thank you. I am trying to be the one as a example to move forward yet I am still in a form of stuck.
I just seem to be more stuck with the recent landmine of deaths.
I have been working thru and although I think I have come so far, we have still found victim energy in me. Yikes.
It’s a learning curve for sure.
Thank you for your insights. So many good points.
December 1 2022
Holidays are no biggie around here. I don’t get myself caught up in all the busy-ness anymore. Pretty laid back.
I am just human like everyone else and have my own little life upsets that I need to work through. At least I have the tools to do so. I got really triggered a few weeks ago, going back to home town. I have been working through those triggers and may have overdone it lol. I keep going clearing stuff til I knock myself out… or out of my body lol.
Other than that. OMG!!!!!!!!!!!!!! It is the end of the year! Tax stuff, website stuff, keeping up with all that. Business promos through the radio. Amy Jo put all those classes on sale and I got several messages asking my recommendations, and other questions. I got a bunch of FCOA stuff cleaned up, then made a YouTube video about organizing all of it.
So… nothing “wrong” here, just I needed my own boost of some intense self care 🙂
I am hibernating. We have -18 C out there right now. BRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR lol